It seems that the topic of the need to integrate opposites is a lively one because it keeps on popping up. Quite a few recent comments are indicative of the importance of this topic and the need to explore it more.
One such comment is one by Ruel Maekar in which he pointed to the need to the integration of opposites rather than their balance.
He wrote in his comment, “Integration is holistic – we talk work-life balance as polarity or at least a binary relationship. Home is the center circle.”
This intriguing idea caught my attention. Does not integration bring balance as well? Can we have the balance of opposites without integrating them? Would this be a faked kind of balance?
Think about it by taking an example and that is following your mind or heart when the two point to two opposing directions.
The balance between the heart and the mind is not a simple matter of choice, but of integration, wrote Rached ALIMI. “True wisdom lies in the ability to understand and engage with these two internal voices, even when their messages seem opposed. It is not the perfection of the decision that matters, but the authenticity of the process. Every hesitation, every tension between reason and emotion, reveals a fundamental aspect of our humanity. Paradoxically, it is not the “right” choice that defines us, but the way we live through this inner dilemma”.
Can Balance Not Lead to Integration?
Imagine a situation in which you think negatively and positively about an issue. You spend long days focusing on the negative sides and blowing them out of proportion. Then you spend a similar number of days focusing on the positive sides of the same issue. Will this lead to a balanced integration of the two?
Before answering this question we need first to realize that our negativity bias will give more weight to the negative aspects that positive thinking cannot match.
Second, by spending a long time focusing on one extreme opposite we may not be the same person because of the tension that puts us on the edge of chaos.
The other scenario is to keep swinging very fast between the two opposites. This is fatiguing because it leaves us undecided. We are more off balance than when we started.
“And there is only one way to avoid making the wrong choices and making the right decisions: listening to both voices and integrating their thoughts. Understanding what the head and the heart tell us. Finding a way to make them talk to each other”- by Aldo Delli Paoli
We are only balancing the time we spend on each opposite bit, so the outcome may be completely out of balance.
“Everything naturally aligns and flows without intense attraction or repulsion when integrated. If polar opposites are too extreme, then we tend to oscillate between them rather than become a balanced combination of both”- Mahatma Das.
Integration is to hold the two opposites in the center and integrate them. This is the only possible way to get integrated balance.